I am surrounded non-stop by little screaming devils that have the faces of angels… They drive you insane, but they’re just too damn cute to beat. Add that to the fact that I never can find the vodka when I need it the most, Walmart only hires incompetent employees, and random snowstorms only occur whenever you’ve just driven two and a half hours to see a movie; and it’s a wonder that I’m not dancing in the streets with a thong on my head. Below, you’ll find posts detailing the path to a padded room…


Not what you need?

I am the all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world.

I just received and email from mint.com letting me know that the balance in my Chase account is “low”, and that I should “proceed with caution“.

I balanced that account earlier this morning.

And was so thrilled that I had that much money leftover after paying bills that …

98 and three-fourths percent guaranteed

Today, The Baby turns four.

She has asked for “birfday coffee, birfday sushi, and birfday strawberrrrry cake”.

My job here is obviously done.

Kid, you’ll move mountains.…

Wire Coathangers et cetera

We should probably get this clear right off the bat…

I am not above pinching my children.

Hard.

Yes, I can see that you are on a date of some sort, and I, for one, am simply thrilled- thrilled– that your many hours of cyber-wooing paid off in the …

I don’t know what to say, except it’s Christmas and we’re all in misery.

i have no idea...

Took the kids over the weekend to see the new *gasp* animated Disney film… Dinner, tickets, and snacks for 5 (three of which are children-like creatures) ended up costing just under a hundred bucks.

There is something just plain wrong with that.

[Flash to evil corporate meisters bah humbugging into

The Post Where I Cut Off All of My Fingers… Otherwise Known As ‘There’s an App for That’

My sister and I argue a lot.

Usually it’s over a misplaced movie quote or a she was totally in that other film, she just had a different nose sort of thing…

But mostly it’s over who tried to kill the other last or who’s turn it is to make …

When There’s More Than One, It’s Called a Murder…

Bag o' Bones

Something Wicked This Way Comes…

While getting ready for Halloween festivities, I looked over at my super-cute daughter, 3,  prancing about in the hastily purchased drugstore sorceress costume and said, “Oh, honey, you look pretty!”

To which she responded, “Yep, mama. I look GOOD.”

Are You Questioning My Badassness?

That …

Call Me When I’m Sober…

Thursday

Hours to New Orleans from Huntsville  via minivan equipped with 3 screaming children: 7

Friday

Hours necessary for errant husband to convince me to move back to Louisiana despite my SIGNIFICANT (Look! ALL CAPS for EMPHASIS) misgivings: 5

Saturday

Hours to Hunstville from New Orleans via minivan with no …

On the Owning of a Kitten, Part I (A Guide by Judith Shakespeare)

Kittens, my dear friend, are very curious creatures.

They care not a whit for your sensibilities nor your culture and are quite happy to become that thing inside your household around which the entire world revolves. This, of course, may cause quite a bit of concern amongst the small people …



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