They’re Coming to Take Me Away…OR Desperately Seeking Bartender/Babysitter with Large Luxury Vehicle

This kind of panicked deer in the headlights, make no sudden movements, look?
We call that the “Oh my Goober, my mom has been stuck in this house for two solid weeks with us with no relief and has started wearing panties on her head and holding conversations with her coffee pot again” look around these here parts.
And it’s a look that we’ve been seeing a lot recently.
Probably because I’m getting the the point of being insane enough to start wearing panties on my head and holding conversations with my coffee pot… again.
Peter has been working late what seems like every night.
The Cynical Sister done lost her marbles and moved to Alabama.
The air conditioner in my car isn’t working because it’s 90 degrees outside- and that’s my luck.
I have friends all over the world- just none here in Hillbilly Hell.
And for some odd reason, I can’t seem to find ‘Double Bloody Mary’ anywhere on my list of low-calorie drinks.
Sigh.